Britain Needs YOU Hoodie

Lord Kitchener’s back, finger jabbing accusingly from the chest of this cosy hoodie, delivering the most urgently needed recruitment message of our times: BRITAIN NEEDS YOU TO STOP BEING A C*NT.

This gloriously cheeky parody of the famous WWI poster combines imperial sternness with modern British bluntness – perfect for pulling over your head when the news is particularly grim, the queue is particularly slow, or you just need to hide from the general state of things.

• Super-soft fleece lining for maximum comfort while delivering silent (or not-so-silent) judgement
• Kangaroo pocket – ideal for hiding biscuits, phone, or hands clenched in quiet rage
• Adjustable drawstring hood to shield you from awkward eye contact with fellow citizens
• Bold, high-quality print that won’t fade faster than political principles
• Available in 14 brilliant colours (khaki for proper wartime authenticity, black for subtle menace, or bright red if you really want the message to land from across the street)

Unisex fit, because the call to better behaviour is universal. Wear it to the pub, the match, or your next passive-aggressive family gathering.

Your country needs you. Pull yourself together, pop the hood up, and for heaven’s sake – sort it out.