Walmington-on-Sea Home Guard Needs YOU T-Shirt

Mainwaring is pointing straight at you with that trademark mix of pompous authority and barely-contained panic, demanding you join the finest (and most chaotic) platoon in Britain. "WALMINGTION-ON-SEA HOME GUARD PLATOON NEEDS YOU" – because who else is going to defend the seaside from invaders when the regulars are busy?

This hilarious parody of the classic recruitment poster captures Mainwaring in full "stupid boy" mode, ready to issue orders, fall over bayonets, or accidentally capture a U-boat crew. Perfect for fans who know that the real enemy was Jonesy's van, Wilson's sarcasm, or Pike's scarf.

• Premium soft cotton – ideal for hasty retreats or church parade
• Bold, high-quality print that survives more washes than the platoon's ammunition
• Unisex fit – suitable for captains, sergeants, or even walking sticks
• Available in multiple colours (bottle green for that authentic Home Guard vibe)

Wear it to the pub, the reenactment, or your next family gathering and declare: "We're doomed!" with pride. After all, in the face of modern nonsense, Britain still needs blokes like you – just don't tell them your name, Pike.

Don't panic, Mr Mainwaring – order yours today!